Expectations. We all have them. If you’re like me, the default response when they’re not met often includes eye rolls, and an overwhelming sense of disappointment / frustration.
But let’s be honest for a second. Sometimes our expectations are inappropriate and unrealistic. Expectations can be things we may feel we deserve, or are entitled to... Or they can be something we unconsciously start to desire because of what we’ve seen others experience.
There are a lot of tips out there regarding managing expectations, and this isn’t that, at all. LOL! I just wanted to share my quick thoughts and one tactic that I use to “unpack” my expectations. My goal is to see what my expectations are and where they’re coming from. Then, I determine what, if anything, I can do.
But #howsway?? Glad you asked. So peep. My “expectation” isn’t met and I start feeling a way. RIGHT at that point when I feel myself become irritated or disappointed, I run through a quick mental checklist. And sometimes I write it out. This does two things: helps me to take a breather and refocus my energy in the moment... And here it is:
What do I expect?
Where did this expectation come from?
Is this a reasonable expectation? Why or why not?
Is the other party aware of my expectations? (If applicable)
What are my options? What can I do?
Here’s some additional food for thought:
People don’t always have the capacity or the desire to meet our expectations.
Entitlement can strangle relationships.
Try not to impose or manipulate someone into meeting your expectations.
Communication is key. Share your desires and where they stem from. Ask the other party directly, for their feedback. Ask, is this (insert expectation) something you’re willing and able to meet?
I’d love to hear from you! Let me know your thoughts if you try this out. What do you think about expectations? What have you discovered about yourself and your expectations? Comment below!
